Without a doubt, there are conversation busters that will put you at a competitive disadvantage, so it’s vital that you’re aware of what they are, so that you can avoid them at all costs. A conversation is a two-way street, but if one person decides to hijack it and overpower the other person, things can fall off the tracks very quickly. The idea is to keep things on track, so that you can deepen the relationship, and drive more business.
Like with everything I share, I speak from real life experience, so if you want to know what works vs. doesn’t work, I’ve already done the testing for you, and when it comes to conversation busters that put you at a competitive disadvantage, there’s no one better than me to explain what not to do. I’ve been guilty of all them, and I can tell you first hand, you will not like the results you get if you do any of them on a consistent basis. So without further adieu, here’s my list of conversation busters.
Never come from a point of less than.
Successful conversations are had by two mutual parties engaging in flowing conversations. Coming from a point of less than will put you at a distinct disadvantage because the other person in the conversation will wonder why you’re just cowering to the conversation. You are equal, you are important, and what you have to say is just as important as what anyone else has to say. Control the conversation, engage in the conversation, and never come from a point of less than.
Never talk at a person.
If you’ve ever been in a conversation where someone is pointing at you and talking right at you, I’m sure you know how much this drives you crazy. Refrain from doing this yourself, as this is something that people really don’t like. There’s always a better way to have a conversation, than to talk at a person. In fact, talking at a person even isn’t considered a conversation, it’s more of a one-sided speech.
Never blame shift and deflect the conversation.
Shifting the blame in a conversation is one of the absolute worst things you can do. Instead of blame shifting, soften the tone of the conversation and lead the person down a path where they come to their own conclusion that they had a large part in the issue that occurred. Believe me, this works way better for everyone involved. People will get defensive real quick if you corner them by blame-shifting, so be smart about how you handle the conversation.
There you have them. Remember them moving forward, and if you hear yourself starting to slip into one of these conversation busters, stop immediately, and redirect your behavior, so that you come from a positive conversation viewpoint. Use conversation to put yourself at an advantage, not a disadvantage. Give people a chance to talk, be understanding, listen intently, but don’t be afraid to bail on the conversation if someone is acting out and not adhering to your guidelines to having a successful and flowing conversation. Any conversation needs to be a two-way street to be successful.